I Hate Your Guts | 
 enlarge | Author: Jim Norton
Publisher: Simon & Schuster
Category: EBooks
List Price: $24.95
Buy New: $9.99
You Save: $14.96 (60%)
Rating:  87 reviews
Sales Rank: 2119
Format: Kindle Book
Media: Kindle Edition
Pages: 272
Number Of Items: 1
Dewey Decimal Number: 814.6
ASIN: B001KQ61MY
Publication Date: November 4, 2008
Availability: Usually ships in 24 hours
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Product Description
When New York Times bestselling author and comedian Jim Norton isn't paying for massages with happy endings, or pretending to be fooled by transsexuals he picks up, he spends his time wondering what certain people would look like on fire...What do Heather Mills, the Reverend Al Sharpton, and Dr. Phil have in common? Jim Norton hates their guts. And he probably hates yours, too, especially if you're a New York Yankee, Starbucks employee, or Steve Martin.In thirty-five hilarious essays, New York Times bestselling author and comedian Jim Norton spews bile on the people he loathes. Enjoy his blistering attacks on Derek Jeter, Hillary Clinton, fatso Al Roker, and mush-mouthed Jesse Jackson. It's utterly hilarious -- and utterly relatable if you've ever bitten a stranger's face or thrown a bottle through the TV screen while watching the news.But don't think Jim just dishes loads of shit on his self-proclaimed enemies; he is equally atrocious to himself. He savages himself for his humiliating days as a white homeboy, his balletlike spins in the outfield during a little league game, and his embarrassingly botched attempt at a celebrity shout-out while taping his new HBO stand-up series.Uncomfortably honest, I Hate Your Guts is probably the best example of emotional vomiting you'll ever read. But there is hope; at the end of each essay, Jim generously offers helpful suggestions as to how the offender can make things right again: Eliot Spitzer: If you run for re-election, instead of shaking hands with voters, let them smell your fingers.Reverend Al Sharpton: The next time you feel the need to protest, do so dressed as an elk in Ted Nugent's backyard.Hillary Clinton: When you absolutely must make a point of laughing publicly, don't fake it. Just think of something that genuinely makes you laugh, like lowering taxes or any random male having his penis cut off.For the legions of devoted fans who know Jim Norton for his raw, sometimes brutal comedy, I Hate Your Guts is what you've been waiting for. But even more important -- it's a great book to read while taking a shit.
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| Customer Reviews: Read 82 more reviews...
Norton Rules January 6, 2009
Peter Tokar (East Coast USA)
What can you say. Jim Norton is one of the funniest, filthiest comedians around. Buy it Frrrrrrrrunkis!
Lil' Jimmy strike again! December 24, 2008
DHO (NOLA, United States)
This book is hilarious. It is a book that will actually make you LOL
For all you critics, this is a book written by a comedian for comedic purposes. If you can't take a joke or expect every book to be as well written as War and Peace, then this is the wrong book for you. . . and I hate your guts.
For every one else, enjoy.
Couldn't put it down December 21, 2008
Mark D. Calkins (Puyallup WA)
I bought this just before a cross country flight. I could not stop reading it. I had a hard time suppressing my laughter so as not to disturb the other passengers. Jim has a talent for making people laugh and feel uncomfortable at the same time.
Another Jim Norton book December 19, 2008
Alexander R. Grosby (Burlington, VT USA)
Another great read that I hope to buy from Borders and return upon reading! - Groz
Ted's Review December 19, 2008
N. Coen
My name's Ted from Ted's Big Book Emporium and if you like to read and are afraid of ghosts-ts-ts-ts like me, then pick up I Hate Your Guts by Jim Norton.
It takes me back to when I was a little boy staying at my Uncle Paul's house. He would come into my bedroom late at night to read Lolita to me after a good old fashioned game of "Monster Rain".
Every chapter this meaty breasted ziltch writes will contain many "Happy Endings". This book is as much fun as doing the chicken dance at a child's wake. Linger Longer and FRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRUNKIS!!!!
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